What influences have come to define you this past year?

“They are no more defined by the world than I am defined by the world”

John 17:16 (the message)

This is Jesus praying on our behalf just prior to entering the garden in his final days here on earth.  He was declaring that his disciples were intended to live by a different narrative than the culture around them.  That was true then and it’s true still today.

Daily, we are bombarded with messages that tell us who we should be, how we should think, and the best way to live. As a woman, those messages range from “you can do it all” to “you’re not enough.” You should fit into this size of clothing, have a picture-perfect family, care about every injustice in the world, and make sure your home decor matches every changing season. Also, don’t forget about all this amazing stuff that you need to buy to give you ultimate happiness!  Those messages are coming at us faster than ever before as we scroll our social media feeds, check our inboxes, and watch online videos.  Even listening to music (unless you are paying a premium), pop-up advertisements will try to cater to your preferences and interrupt your playlist.  I’m not saying that participating in all of those online spaces is necessarily bad. I am wondering though: how do we filter those messages? How do we discern what we are receiving is true? As women who are pursuing a life of being transformed into the likeness of Jesus, what is really defining us?

An easy habit

The other day, I was in a conversation with friends. We were discussing spiritual practices to help us connect to God three times throughout the day: morning, noon, and evening.  Three times a day is a long-standing practice of many liturgical traditions.  My initial gut reaction was one of protest.  Three times a day? How would that be possible in my daily schedule with the responsibilities of work, mothering, caring for a home, tending to relationships, etc?  Where is there time to fit in three moments of building a relationship with God?

Within moments, I counteracted that gut check with the realization that I don’t schedule in time to check my Instagram account. Or other social media sites. Or my email. I just do it.  I easily click open the app three times a day for at least 5 minutes at a time (likely more!) Why? Because it’s easy. I’ve easily slipped into daily patterns of checking in with the world without making space for checking in with God and my own heart. Does that resonate with you?

A little salt and a lot of color

That’s a hard pill to swallow.  We have intentions of being with Jesus in prayer, scripture reading or simply sitting in silence with him.  But, those intentions can easily be derailed by the distractions that are right at our fingertips.  We find ourselves making excuses of not enough time when the truth is, we aren’t prioritizing how we spend our time.

In addition to that, how we are spending our time is forming us. We are being influenced by the things that we consume online. Over time, those little lies find space in your heart and mind to make their home and they begin to grow.  They start to impact the way you view yourself and the way you view the world.  But the thing is, Jesus has already told us that we aren’t supposed to be defined in the same way the rest of the world is.  He gave us an identity and a way to view the world through His lens when we chose to follow Him. He has called you beloved daughter.  You belong to Him.  You are the salt of the earth. You are the light of the world.

“You’re here to be salt-seasoning that brings out the God-flavors of this earth. If you lose your saltiness, how will people taste godliness?”

Matthew 5:13 (the message)

I want to be someone who adds just enough flavor into the world that people notice and they notice it for good.  Recently, we were reading this same passage in our Advent reading, I heard my youngest daughter say “goodness” in place of godliness. It seemed like a perfect replacement because I want to be someone who calls out the good in others and the good I see in the world.

“You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in this world.”

Matthew 5:14 (the message)

When I hear the word colors, I don’t think of black and white.  I think of bold, bright yellows and reds.  Blends like turquoise and magenta.  Lush greens and bright blues.  The world wants us to fit into one side or the other: black or white.  I’m not talking about skin color.  I’m talking about views, perspectives, ideas.  You think like this OR like this.  But, we are called to bring color into the world.  Splashing the unique blend that God has made us to be onto the canvas of this world.

What’s your soak time?

We have to be able to counter the messages that are trying to define us and what we believe by choosing what we allow into our lives and how much time we spend soaking in it.  I enjoy soaking in a bath or a hot tub on a cold night.  It’s warm and comforting as you slip into the water.  I find my muscles relaxing and I close my eyes. The time spent in this place of comfort seems to no longer matter.  But, after a while, I look at my wrinkly, white fingers and realize that I’ve been soaking in the water too long!  Isn’t that what it’s like when we spend excessive time consuming online media?  It’s often a good and enjoyable distraction.  But, if we spend too long immersed in it, we come out of it rather disoriented, feeling a bit wrinkly, and wondering how much time has passed!

As we sit here at the beginning of 2022,  it’s a good time to take a look back and also a look forward.  What has shaped you in 2021? What was influencing you? What do you desire to shape you in 2022? Here are a few helpful ideas: