Rhythms of grace

I’ve never been good at slowing down to rest. My calendar is evidence of my busy life!  I write to-do lists and make a plan for the day. Check the boxes and cross off the items and I feel accomplished.  I love the smell of a clean house and seeing everything put back in its place.  My weekends are filled with spending time with friends and hosting people in our home. Our house is known to be a place where friends are welcomed around the table, the firepit is ready, and the living room is open for just dropping by!

A heart of hospitality

Reading the story of two sisters who welcomed Jesus into their home, I’ve always resonated more with Martha than Mary.  Martha displays this genuine heart of hospitality towards Jesus.  I imagine her moving back and forth between the kitchen and the room where Jesus is sitting.  She wants to honor the one she calls Lord with the meal she’s prepared for Him. She creates this atmosphere of welcome for Him in her home.  Even the cleanliness of her kitchen should be pleasing to Him!  She has this simple desire for Him to feel at home with her. That heart of hospitality feels familiar to me.  Some of my favorite compliments from guests in our home have been when a guest declares, “your home is so welcoming and cozy.”  That gives me so much joy!

But at some point when Martha is serving in her gift of hospitality, she begins to shift towards bitterness and jealousy.  She shifts her gaze from Jesus, whom she longs to please, over to her sister Mary who sits at His feet, absorbing all the truth and wisdom that He is sharing.  Instead of Martha recognizing her own desire to also sit with Jesus, she is filled with resentment towards her sister and possibly even towards Jesus.  “Don’t you care?” she says to Him.  “She’s left all the work in the kitchen for me to do alone!  Tell her to come and help me!” (my paraphrase)  I hear a tone in her voice that sounds similar to that of my tween daughters when they feel as though the other isn’t doing their share of the work!  But I also relate to those feelings of bitterness or jealousy when I’m carrying the responsibilities of hosting. I’m cleaning up the kitchen alone while guests are laughing and enjoying deep conversation around the table. I feel the tension of wanting to be in the room with those I love and cleaning up the mess made by a delightful dinner.

An invitation

Martha often gets portrayed as the sister who is doing it wrong in this story. She gets corrected by Jesus for being too busy and not being more like Mary. I can’t count how many times these two sisters and their story have spoken to me over the years. It’s always been a similar theme:

Lay down the busyness of doing. Come and sit at the feet of Jesus.  

Be more like Mary!  

You are more like Martha but it’s BETTER if you would be like Mary.

Reading this story more recently, God stirred my heart to see Mary and Martha from a different view. Jesus isn’t preferring Mary. He didn’t choose Mary over Martha. His love for them is the same.  Jesus is simply speaking to Martha about what she needed to hear at that moment.  He’s tender with her.  “Martha, my daughter, I see you and hear you.  You are feeling anxious and worried about many things.  Your busyness is just a distraction from what is going on in your heart.”  He affirms her and then extends her an invitation, not a reprimand.  He invites her to step away from the work, the constant need to be doing and serving. He invites her to choose what is essential:  being with Him when she is anxious and troubled.  I don’t believe that Jesus is asking Martha to be like Mary.  He’s asking her to choose the same posture as Mary.  There’s a place at His feet for Martha too.  It’s an invitation to find the rhythm between work and rest.

Rhythms of rest and work

That gives me such hope.  I long to have the posture of Mary but I also know that I love to serve others with hospitality, like Martha.  I hear God saying that I don’t have to abandon one for the other. But, I do need to find a rhythm of rest and work.  I have a sense of purpose in my accomplishments and in serving others.  I’ve learned that I lean towards completing tasks, checking off the list, meeting the goal, or finishing the project.  But in the last few years, I’ve learned to fight for rest.  I’m learning to set boundaries around my time.  I make what the bible calls Sabbath as a priority on my weekly calendar.  I know the value of not always doing for God but being with Him. Jesus declares that He is a place of rest for us.

“Come to me all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matt 11: 28-30.    

Jesus makes the great exchange for what we are experiencing when we come to Him.  He trades the hard work of labor for what is easy.  He takes the heaviness of what we are carrying and makes it light. 

The balanced life

I love the Message version of Jesus’ invitation in Matthew 11:

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life.  I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me-watch how I do it.  Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.

That sounds like the kind of life that I’m after.  Learning what it looks like to live in the “unforced rhythms of grace”.  Working and resting with Him. Sitting at His feet in those essential moments, listening for His voice without the distractions. Finding the balance between serving wholeheartedly like Martha and the posture of resting and receiving like Mary.